The Top 10 Shows I Would Like to See on TV
BY DANI FAITH LEONARD
10 - Real Housewives of the Ozarks // So far all of these housewives have been rich as hell and they love to talk about it. The majority of people can’t relate to their problems, so how about a group of people that are equally not relatable...cause they’re mountain-folk. Winters Bone...meet Bravo.
9 - America’s Next Top Little Model // TLC loves shows about little people - The Little Couple, Little Chocolatiers, Little People, Big World. Tyra is definitely out of material. With a little bit of imagination...
8 - Skiing With Celebrities // If the wipeouts on Skating with Celebrities made you cringe, imagine when they are traveling downhill at 30mph.
7 - Monsey Shore // All of the sex on the Jersey Shore might be too much for some people. If that’s the case, you might like Monsey Shore. Seven people are chosen to live in a house in the town of Monsey, NY where the population is mostly Hasidic Jews and 41% of people still speak Yiddish at home. Oy vey!
6 - American Idol - Results Shows Only // Want to hate TV? I kind of want to hate TV sometimes, as it is a major source of procrastination. There is nothing on TV that is as terrible as the American Idol results shows. Nothing happens. Nothing! If there were a marathon of results shows, I would write a novel, do my taxes and return my unwanted holiday gifts. Bring it on, Seacrest.
5 - I Didn’t Know I was Pregnant...Gone Wild // You had a big belly, pains in your lower back, missed your period for nine months and you had no idea that you might be expecting. Popping out babies you didn’t know you were going to have in your toilet at home is traumatic. So why not pop them out on a party bus with Joe Francis?
4 - Rock of Love 3 - Charlie Sheen // Of course, Charlie Sheen is involved with a different kind of rock.
3 - America’s Ugliest Person Competition // Dog owners have made their ugly dogs compete against each other for years in the “Ugliest Dog Competition.” There is something pretty hilarious that all of their owners have in common, and I don’t think I need to explain the side competition that we should have going on.
2 - Survivor: Toddlers in Tiaras // These kids are fierce competitors who have braved rough conditions like airbrush tans, eyebrow waxes and hair extensions...and they’re only 4. Let’s see what they do with tarantulas, scorpions and weekly eliminations.
1 - Bring back The Swan!
For all of Dani's Top 10 lists, click here.